It just got real. Too real.

A friend shared this article on facebook written by someone named "Amanda", and the title intrigued me: "26, unmarried, and childless". So spot on for myself that I had to read it.

Let me preface this by saying that I am happy with my current state of being. I have 2 dogs, 1 cat and 2 horses that I absolutely adore and who most of the time feel the same way about me. I have a wonderful family who will drop what they are doing and drive 2 hours away to help me when I need it. I have the best grandparents in the world who are wonderful examples of a godly, Christian marriage. My close friends are always there when I need them. And while sure, I would love to be in a relationship, I can't say I care much for the idea of having kids at this point in my life, or even being married anytime soon.

What I do have a problem with is the seemingly innocent things people say to me, which she hits on in her article. As far as not being in a relationship, one thing I particularly hate hearing in addition to what she says is "You should try online dating". I would never presume that I knew more about where a person was in their own life than they themselves do, so I find this statement particularly offensive, especially when it is delivered to me without preface. It's as if I'm not doing enough (?) to find my other half, and this person thinks the only solution is to take to the interwebs in the hopes that I'm matched up with that someone perfect.

I'll say right now: my current city is not conducive to meeting people. Since it's a college town, the majority of the population is at least 4 years younger than me, and most people my age are married or in a serious relationship. But on the other hand, I work full time, I take classes full time, I'm doing an internship for my classes, and I try to ride and spend time with my pets in between- I don't have time to meet anyone right now, online or otherwise!

Then, there is the whole child thing. I've never felt drawn to the idea of having kids. I'm aware that may change if I get married. But if you want me to punch you in the face, then say to me, "Oh, you'll change your mind about having kids one day." So what if I do? Or if I don't? Is that really anyone's business but my own? It's like people are so blown away by my dismissal of motherhood that they try to find something to say that makes themselves feel better while completely disregarding my thoughts. I can understand that when I meet someone I want to marry, I may relish the thought of a little copy of us running around. But I have many reasons for not wanting kids, in addition to just plain not wanting them! And I don't think I should be judged for refusing to bring a kid into this world just because it's the "thing to do". Honestly, the only good thing I see about having a kid is buying them their own horse, which will be another horse for myself. I said it.

So, before my feelings get too intense (this is supposed to be a blog about ponies and pictures and the diverse averageness that is life), I'll finish by saying that I hope you'll read the article and maybe think about the message you're giving to singles/childless/etc when you think you're being helpful or funny. Chances are, either we're happy with our lives and don't need unwarranted advice, or we're incredibly aware of what we see as our shortcomings and don't need them acknowledged over and over.